littleness and diapers...

I know that some people associate the two...some think you can't have one without the other. And I think that it is unfortunate. A friend of mine who is interested in trying the diapers, but is not sure she likes it is very worried that if she doesn't do it then she isn't really little. I don't think its true. I think that to be little to just that to be little. You do not have to be a certain age or mindset. Though I like them, I don't want it to be the focus of what is going on between me and my future daddy. One day I might decide it's too much of a hassle and never want to do it anymore. And I would want my partner to be ok with that decision.

However...spanking will never change hehehe

YAY!!!

I'm glad that people are feeling comfortable enough to post comments!!! I've been finding myself contemplating that question once more....that thought that will not leave me be! The idea of being spanked till I cry has arisen once more. As soon as I think i have laid it to rest...it comes back in my head. I still wonder if it is possible. Those who have spanked me have yet to attain it...though i think only 2 have REALLY tried. Is it possible? is stupid? I do not know.

A year....

I fought hard for a year to reach a place where things are clicking. It took until my third job to find the right one for me, hours, pay, benefits, and people. It took a fill year to get here. A year of fights, of loneliness, and of anger. Finally things work. There have been times when i wanted to scream, where I cried, where I wondered "WHY?!" What drove me to do this? To leave all that I knew and take off on my own. Was it irritation? Selfishness? Someway of proving myself? I still ask myself this question sometimes, just as they do. I've changed though. Changed things about me. I've become more rational, more open. I don't feel so vulnerable all the time anymore. I feel like I can be me and not be afraid anymore. I've discovered my littleness, and im learning to let go. Everything from before seems only a dream, its not bearing me down anymore. It's like this strange feeling of calm. I worry less if people don't respond to me. I've reached a point of accepting that sometimes things will just work themselves out. It's interesting that big me has matured as a person, while my little is becoming more and more comfortable being littler.

little beginnings

I will willingly admit that being little is rather new to me. Something i did not explore until this last year. HOWEVER, when i go back and think about things i have done and experimented with it is not quite so surprising.

I know that for a long time i used to take pillows and make a circle in my living room to stay in while i played because it just made me more comfortable.

Also, once I made a diaper out of an old tshirt because it just seemed right at the moment and i slept with it one.

Lastly, my family had this broken loft bed. So it was just 3 sides with the mattress taken off the the top. A few times I hung a blanket from that 4th side and pretended it was a crib. I never knew why i felt compelled to do such a thing, i just WANTED to.

Big problems for little people...

I know I'm not the only person with this problem...I just want to make people happy. Case in point, I was offered a job at a law office. Part of me wanted the job...but most of me didn't. If i took the job then it would be a pretty big pay cut...just to work day time? However, the part of me that wanted to take it was the part of me that felt bad for applying in the first place. The office manager was soooo nice to me, he even called me his "ace in the hole".

If I took the job then i would not be able to afford anything, and i wouldn't get back to school. So it was REALLY REALLY hard for me, but i haven't accepted the job (but i haven't QUITE told the law office that...).

This sort of thing happens to me all the time. I find myself doing things to make other people happy. It's gotten me in sticky-type situations. It tends to lead me to making out with people I do not wish to make out with. I just don't want to hurt their feelings you know?

I know a friend of mine says that this is a problem for people that are little...wanting to make other people happy...it just so hard! I don't want people to hate me is all.

Welcome to my blog! :-)

This is my first post on my new blog, but not my first blog post ever. For about 2 1/2 years I had another blog that was alittlebitofspanking.blogspot.com. I abandoned that blog for a few reasons. The main being my family came across it and they just found it strange and funny. I became the butt of many jokes. The other reason I left that blog was because it was founded on my spanko tendencies, and over the last year I have discovered an interest in ageplay. I felt like I was betraying my spanko readers when i posted on ageplay. So thus I have made this new blog. I hope you all can read and enjoy.